Hetalia Disney
by FireBreathingNinja
Summary: A passing thought: What if the Allies and Axis Power members each had their own Disney character? After watching a series of Disney movies, provided by America, the Hetalia characters compare themselves and are COMPARED to Disney characters. Not a Xover and totally something that I wrote in 20 minutes TOPS. Enjoy and feel free to review!


**Disclaimer: I do not own Disney, nor do I own Hetalia.**

America: Yo, I have a majorly important question for all of you!

England: Gentlemen, prepare yourselves to embrace a block of stupidity…

America: If you guys were any Disney character, who would you be?

China: Disney, aru?

America: Dude, how have you not heard of Disney? It's the most amazing thing ever!

Italy: Can we eat it?

Germany: No, Italy…

England: It is an organization that produces cartoons and animated movies; most of them centered around fairytales, other forms of fiction, and tends to have a lot of music and singing. It was founded by Walter Disney.

America: Hahahaha!

England: What?

America: Silly Iggy, everyone knows that the founder was Mickey Mouse!

England: …

America: You're so cute when you're being stupid. Anyway, since none of you are awesome and know what Disney is all about, I have a whole bunch of movies for us to watch! Get ready, for I am totally about to bring a whole bunch of fucking awesomeness into your boring lives!

Italy: Yay!

Everyone else: Dammit.

* * *

America: So?

China: 'So', what?

America: Duh, what character would you be?

France: Well, _mon cher_, because you're so clever, maybe you should tell _us _first.

America: Pfft. That's easy! I would be super-mega-awesome-hot-and-strong Hercules!

England: Why am I not surprised…

America: Hey! Hey, England?

England: What, you infuriating git?

America: I'll be your Hercules if you'll be by Meg.

England: …

America: Love you too, babe.

* * *

China: I think I would be Genie, aru.

England: From Aladdin?

China: Yes; he is strong, powerful, and desired by everyone, aru.

Japan: But you are not desired by all, China-san.

America: Imma have to agree with Japan – I mean, I totally hate you.

China: I do not care about assholes like you.

Italy: You should be Mulan, ve~!

France: It makes more sense, oui?

China: You are a bunch of criticizing and stereotyping—

England: I actually agree with the frog. Mulan is most befitting to your character. You are graceful, hard-working, intelligent—

America: Not to mention you're both cross-dressing liars.

China: …

Russia: …And China is very beautiful, da?

China: Shut up, aru.

* * *

America: Japan?

Japan: I will not be participating in this…

America: Aw~! C'mon~!

Japan: No.

Italy: Belle!

France: Oh, to have such a beauty as Japan to embrace my French culture!

Japan: I must protest—

England: True, Belle is intelligent, does not say much, loyal to family—

China: Unlike Japan.

France: And her lover is a beast!

Japan: Nani?!

Germany: We know all about you and Greece…

Japan: Doitsu!

America: And there ya have it, Japan's Disney character!

Japan: …Hai…

Russia: This is a fun game.

* * *

America: The Shadow Man

France: Pardon?

America: Iggy would be the Shadow Man.

England: …Am I supposed to take offense to that?

America: No! I mean, but because you know, you're both freak with the voodoo… and… other magic… stuff.

France: Voodoo?

England: I practice no such thing!

Russia: But you use black magic, da?

England: W-well I—

America: oh yeah! You tried to use it to curse me or somethin'!

England: …

France: Quite the evil soul, aren't you, mon cher?

China: Or he sold it.

England: Shut the bloody hell up! And I'm not your 'cher', wino!

America: Yeah, he's mine! … What's 'cher' mean again?

Germany: Why am I surrounded by such dummkofts?

* * *

Russia: I wish to be known as the she-dog from 100 Dalmatians.

America: So you want us to call you a bitch?

Russia: …

America: Okay! Jeez, lay off on the pipe! You want to be Cruela Devil, fine!

Russia: Yes.

China: How suiting…

Russia: Hm?

England: Her name is "Cruel Devil" when deciphered.

Russia: Excellent. And I shall mend you all into my finest coat. That way you will really become one with Mother Russia.

China: … I blame America, aru.

America: No more Disney for Mr. Tall, Dark, and Morbid.

* * *

Italy: Germany would be Pocahontas!

Everyone: …

China: Who is…?

France: She was the Native American princess.

Germany: …Italy?

Italy: Ve~?

Germany: Why—How would I…?

America: Why would THE KRAUT be Pocahontas?

Italy: I don't know… Because I really like Pocahontas?

Germany: ….

Italy: Ve~! Now Germany looks like Sebastian!

* * *

Italy: Snow White!

Kumajiro: Who?

Canada: Not now, Kuma.

Japan: Germany-san would be Snow White?

Italy: Si!

Everyone: …

Germany: But only moments ago you said I was Pocahontas…

Italy: Si! But you're also the whitest person I know~!

Germany: …

England: Italy, why don't you go take a siesta?

Italy: Okay!

America: Wait! We need his character—ah, well.

France: Why don't you choose for him, Germany?

Germany: … Aurora…

China: From Sleeping Beauty?

England: How lovely.

Germany: ONLY BECAUSE HE IS AN INCOMPETENT IDIOT AND HE'S ALWAYS SLEEPING!

Russia: Do not lie, Germany. Only dogs lie.

America: Pfft. And I thought you wanted to use our pelts for your coat…

Japan: Do not remind him, America-san!

* * *

England: France would be Pinocchio

America: And you've now officially ruined Disney for me.

* * *

**Author's Note of Awesomeness:**

**This really just started out as a passing thought about China being a lot like Mulan… And I also I had a feeling that if someone said that, he would get really pissy about it. Hope you enjoyed! Considering I literally wrote this in about 15 minutes. **

**FBN is going to sleep.**

**Reviews are lovely!**


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